Police Report: Edward ‘Big Balls’ Coristine Assaulted in Alleged Carjacking

Edward ‘Big Balls’ Coristine, a local businessman known for his controversial nickname, was allegedly assaulted in a carjacking incident last night, according to a police report.

According to witnesses, Coristine was getting into his luxury car outside a popular nightclub when he was approached by two masked individuals who demanded his keys. When he refused, the suspects reportedly became violent and attacked him.

Coristine sustained several injuries, including a broken nose and several bruises, before managing to escape and seek help from a nearby security guard. The assailants fled the scene in his car, which was later found abandoned a few miles away.

Police are currently investigating the incident and have urged anyone with information to come forward. Coristine, who is well-known in the community for his flashy lifestyle and rumored ties to organized crime, has declined to comment on the incident.

This alleged carjacking has sent shockwaves through the community, as many residents are now questioning their safety and security in the wake of this violent attack on one of their own.

As the investigation continues, authorities have assured the public that they are doing everything in their power to bring the perpetrators to justice and ensure that incidents like this do not happen again in the future.

Stay tuned for updates on this developing story as more information becomes available.